Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Just so you know, Avril, your record wasn't even that good

It's those little things that you try to hide that always bite you in the butt. The Salt Lake County library system has a huge catalog of music CDs that you can check out. It's a great way to hear a bunch of stuff that you wouldn't ever really buy. Since we don't live close to any county libraries, it's always an ordeal trying to get the stuff back in on time. I try to be very diligent because I think it is dumb to have to pay a late charge on something that was free in the first place.

I secretly can't get enough of the teen pop divas. I bop my head along to Avril Lavigne, Britney Spears, and even that dang Hilary Duff, but it can be very embarassing. Like when I went to pick up the Shania Twain CD that was on hold for me at the library and it wasn't there. I had to go to reference desk and say, "Is there a CD here for me?" I thought they would ask my name, but instead they said, "What's the name of the CD?"

"Uh, shniatwn."
"You'll have to speak a bit louder."

So embarrasing. Anyway, yesterday I had to pay a fine because I returned a Avril Lavigne CD late. I guess it's a sign that I need to stop listening to that crap.

Monday, August 30, 2004

"Scorched" and an Evening at the Bawden's: A Review

Traci and I hung out with our buddies, Brett and Janeen Bawden last weekend. I gave Janeen the crappy job of choosing a rental movie for the four of us. It’s always hard to find something that everyone will like, but she really came through.

She immediately earned points for taking a risk. She chose the unknown "Scorched," a movie that went straight to DVD. It stars Alicia Silverstone, Woody Harrelson, and that hot chick (Rachael Leigh Cook) that plays Josie in “Josie and the Pussycats.”

There’s a reason why this thing didn’t make it to the big screen. Neither the acting nor the plot are too stunning—three bank tellers who each have independent plans to rob the bank where they work—but since Janeen and I work at a bank (and all four of us have worked as a teller at one time or another) it was an appropriate selection.

It was moderately funny. The thievery plots were all a bit far-fetched, but that wasn’t a real problem. The movie was watchable because every real-life teller dreams of robbing the bank. This wasn’t an “Ocean’s Eleven”-style scheme, it was kids stickin’ it to the man by stealing a bunch of money.

The Bawdens’ home-made salsa gets the best review of the night, though. Brett and Janeen made salsa from ingredients they had grown in their backyard. Nice and hot. Very impressive.

The Owen Money 5

I went to lunch on Saturday with a couple of my high school friends. It proved that six years after high school life is pretty much the same.


I met Owen when I was a junior in high school. I was trying to scrounge up a quarter so I could get a drink out of the pop machine. He gave me the quarter and I found out that had just moved from Maryland. He told me the following really bad joke:

"There were two ducks in a shower and one said to the other, 'Hey, could you hand me the soap?' The other duck replied, 'What do you think I am--a radio?"

It was a brave move to introduce yourself with such a horrible, nonsensical joke. In my mind it was also the perfect move. I decided to take Owen under my wing and help him to get accustomed to the very unique quirks of going to high school in Utah.

On several occasions, my friend Ty and I were successful in getting Owen out of his hermit-like basement existence in order to have interesting misadventures including (but not limited to): losing him downtown on New Year's Eve, having him nearly kill us in his the Wagoneer, "The White Tiger," on our way to the Hogle Zoo and watching him timidly jump on a trampoline for the first time.

In the three years since I have been home from Holland I have seen Owen two times, both of which were as unusual as I had expected. The first was a few years ago when Ty and I went over to his house. Despite not having seen either of us for two years, Owen couldn't talk long because he wanted to make sure he could make it to Cafe Rio before they closed at 9 p.m.


Jamo (Jay-mo) is a computer nerd, but not in the same way I am. He actually knows how to fix computers and make them do cool stuff. I only know how to play on them. He is very intelligent, recently learned to play guitar, and loves the Simpsons. He earned my respect in high school when he volunteered his father's 6-foot-long mounted fish as a prop for us to use for the Christmas dance. We all dressed up in Hawaiian clothes and ran around downtown in the freezing cold carrying this giant fish everywhere we went.

Here's the highlights from the lunch:

OWEN (who is as skinny as a stick) to the WAITRESS: Is there anything healthy on this menu? I'm on a diet.

JAMO on dating: I think I have "G.A.D.D."--girl attention deficit disorder. I just get bored so easily with girls.

OWEN: I haven't been on a date in seven months.

OWEN: I had a girlfriend and we were probably going to get married, but then we broke up.

SPENCER: Was she a lesbian?

OWEN: [laughs, but no answer]

OWEN (after eating about 10 percent of his healthy meal) to the WAITRESS: Can I get a salad?

JAMO: I'm going rock climbing on a date tonight.

SPENCER: Do you know how to rock climb? It's really hard.

JAMO: I'll be fine. I've got really strong arms.

SPENCER: I still work at the same job I had in high school.

JAMO: Me, too.

OWEN: I'm single, unemployed and I live at my parents house. My hair was long for a while,
but I cut it a few months back for a job interview. Now I have short hair again so basically nothing is different than when I was in high school.

SPENCER: Well guys, this was fun. We'll do it again in six months. Maybe in three months if anything interesting happens in your lives.

OWEN: [silence]

JAMO: [silence]

It was a good time.

Friday, August 27, 2004

Puke Bowl--Because I'm Sure You Care...

Last night was rough. Traci works until 9 p.m on Thursdays so I generally try to get as much rockin' in as possible while she's away. I had big plans for getting some stuff recorded last night. Unfortunately, it was not to be. I got home from work and felt like I was going to throw up at any second. I ate a green popicle, but it was unable to cure me.

Feeling too weak to rock, I sat at the computer with my puke bowl in front of me--just in case the vomit tried to catch me off guard. The vomit never came, so I just sat there feeling like garbage. The Simpsons was particulary funny last night. Each time I laughed I felt like my stomach was going to lose it. I slept on the couch with my little bowl on the floor next to me.

I decided to come to work today. The second that I walked in the door I felt like it was a mistake, but that could just be because my job always makes me feel sick.