Girls! Girls! Girls!

Jennifer loves old Jewish ladies

Last night's episode of the Apprentice again proved how mean girls can be when they are forced to work together. I get stressed out just watching all of the confrontation.

I was happy that Jenn got fired. I actually wish almost all of these girls would get fired. Ivana already should have been gone when Bradford got the raw deal, and Maria should have got sent home last week when she went $5000 over budget. If the girls would less time pointing fingers at each other and more time working, they would probably win the tasks. Fight, fight, fight all the time.

Don't step on Maria's designer suits!

Am I the only one who has noticed that Carolyn is so much meaner this season? Can you imagine how she must talk to her kids? "You lost your soccer game? No, you FAILED at your soccer game. There are no excuses!"

Maybe Next Time

Jonny & Virginia Wicks

The Wixes journeyed up to our residence last night. Traci and Virginia--feeling they had gotten a raw deal when they were beaten by Jonny and me in a boys vs. girls game of Trivial Pursuit Pop Culture Edition a few months back--were willing to try their luck again at Trivial Pursuit '90s edition. Big mistake! While it came right down to the wire, the ladies were unprepared for Jonny's secret knowledge of '90s trends and fads. Who would've figured?

Maybe next time, ladies!

What's the Deal with the Apprentice?

I'm just not down with this season of the Apprentice. First of all, I've never liked sitting through the clips of Donald Trump talking about how great he is, or showing off his vast wealth of material treasures. I endure it because I think the game is pretty good. However, this season it has been ridiculous. When Trump walks into a room, they play a fanfare. Give me a break!

I thought last night's episode sucked. The team loses because they are $5000 over budget. Only one person was responsible for the $5,000 and hence the only one responsible for the loss. Instead of firing her, Trump makes a spectacle about Stacie J. being crazy. Of course all the other girls are going to say she is insane so she gets fired instead of them. What's the point of firing her, Mr. Trump? Is it just so you can look cool by saying, "Go get all of the girls out the of the suite!" Duh.

I'm hoping it's going to get a bit better as the season progresses. I have no choice but to keep watching, though, because the O.C.'s not going to be on until November 4th. It's rough when TV lets you down.

Death Cab for Cutie

Full Review Coming Soon!

I went to the Death Cab For Cutie show at RedFest over the weekend. Very, very cool. What most impressed me was their ability to recreate the complexity of their studio recordings in a live setting. They rocked the digital drums, samples, the keyboard and even played one song with two bass players.
Highlights of the evening: "The New Year" as an opener, an extended version of "We Looked Like Giants" and "Transatlanticism" as the perfect closer. Loved it.

Where is Izzy Stradlin?

I was listening to "Use Your Illusion II" by Guns 'n Roses tonight. In the short period before the band's inplosion they wrote a ton of good songs. I was looking through the liner notes and Izzy Stradlin wrote most of the music. Where is Izzy now? Does anybody know?

When you think about G 'n R you think about Axl and Slash. Axl has gone nuts and now Slash is rockin' in Velvet Revolver. I checked VR out, but it's not that great. I've just figured out the reason why--Izzy Stradlin. You can't deny Axl Rose is the coolest frontman ever, but really the X factor (I can't believe I just said "X Factor") is definitely Izzy.

Izzy, where are you? Rockers everywhere need you!

MP3 Blogs—The Next Big Thing

As a novice blogger, I am always quite surprised by all of the new things that I am finding exist out there in cyber world. Thanks to the latest issue of Rolling Stone magazine I learned about my new cyber entity--MP3 blogs.

Instead of writing about their personal lives, MP3 bloggers post a song or two every day by usually obscure artists and then write about why it is a good track.

I think it is a wonderful idea. I am always looking for new bands to get excited about. This gives me a way to check out bands that I would otherwise never hear of in a lifetime.

In my limited searching I have found some really cool blogs. Some of the music has been good, and some has been thoroughly uninteresting. The important thing, for me at least, is the search. I get very excited about finding a hidden gem this way.

A few blogs to try:

www.music.for-robots.com

www.newflux.blogspot.com

www.teachingtheindiekidstodanceagain.blogspot.com

Wranglers-a-Plently

The Bellamy Brothers in Action

I went to my first country concert last week at the Utah State Fair. I absolutely hate country music, but I am a nice brother. I went with my sister Jenny (no one else would go with her) to see her favorite country band, The Bellamy Brothers . The Bellamy Brothers had their first hit in 1976 and they rock pretty good for old cowboys. Here's some of the sights and sounds of the evening:

SOUNDS

Hit songs such as:

• "Give Me a Redneck Girl"
• "If I Said You Had a Beautiful Body Would You Hold it Against Me?"
• "Reggae Cowboy"

SITES

• Many Wranglers
• Old, old people dancing together
• Drunk guy absolutely loving it

Because I work at a redneck credit union, we listen to country music on the Muzak about three days a week. Thanks (but no thanks) to that, I knew four songs by the opening act Carolyn Dawn Johnson. How embarrasing.

Kid Rock

I am pretty sure that I saw Kid Rock at the Utah State Fair. I guess he doesn't have anything better to do these days.

Michael Moore comes to UVSC

Utah Valley State College is shelling out $50,000--the school's entire year-long speaker budget--for Michael Moore to speak at its campus.

First things first. I don't know who I am going to vote for in November. I think George Bush is a liar and kind of a dirtbag. I also pretty sure that John Kerry is a liar and a dirtbag.

Back to Moore. I think a college is the perfect place for Michael Moore to speak. Colleges are where ideas, no matter what they are, should be freely and openly discussed. The one thing that bugs me, though, is the price.

If Michael Moore is such a freedom fighter, why is he charging $50,000? He acts like he is all about getting the truth out there and making sure Bush is not re-elected. I would want to get the "truth" out there, too, if I was making $50,000 for an hour-long speech. If it was really about politics, or saving America, or anything besides money, I think the price tag would be a lot lower.

A big capitalist congrats to Michael Moore for sucking money out of seats of higher learning!

Pretty High on the List of Gross

I just walked in the restroom here at my work to brush my teeth. I could hear somebody talking. There was no standing at the urinals behind me. I glanced toward the stall and realized that was where the voice was coming from. At first I thought this person was talking to himself, but I quickly realized that he was on his cell phone.

I deliberately flushed one of the urinals, figuring it's only fair that if you are on a cell phone in a bathroom that the person you are talking to should also be aware of where you are. I don't think it phased him, though. As he kept talking I could hear him pulling out the toilet paper, taking care of business and flushing the toilet. He didn't miss a beat.

I left before he came out of the stall. I just hope he washed his hands and that no one asks to borrow his phone.

The Traci Celebration

Greetings from Seth

Today is the fourth and final day of Traci's "Birthday Extravaganza!" By next year I am sure that she will find a way to stretch it to an entire week.

I took her out to Tucci's for dinner on Friday night. Since it was her birthday I was forced to watch "13 Going on 30" when we got back home. It's the girl version of "Big." The difference between the two movies was that "Big" was good. (Also, I remember being a little guy and thinking that the lady Tom Hanks falls in love with was SO HOT!!)

Saturday wasn't really birthday-related. We went to see my friend Tiffany's new house in Lehi. I don't generally like having to drive further south than 106th, but I was willing to make an exception because Tiffany makes some great Mexican food. The enchilladas were worth the drive.

Traci was treated to the Sutherland family birthday on Sunday night. My mom called at 6:30 wondering where we were. I thought the party started at 6:30, but I guess it was really at 6 p.m. Whoops. Here's the definition of a Sutherland party: Lainee and Jenny's kids running around like crazy, much screaming and lots of Play-doh everywhere. Four-year-old Meagan also laughed hysterically after calling me "Smelly Spencer."

We're going out with Traci's parents tonight. She's sad that after tonight there won't be any more birthday gifts, but she got lots of gift certificates and I'm sure she'll be able to console herself through shopping.

No Progress

My weekend recording plans were dashed. I had this genius idea that I would borrow my father-in-law's laptop while he was out of town for the weekend. That way I could record my music downstairs in my "rock room," rather than having to relocate all of my equipment upstairs to our computer room.

The plan failed. I couldn't get the recording program installed on the laptop. So instead of just taking the time to bring all of my crap upstairs, I sat downstairs fighting with the computer for three hours and accomplished absolutely nothing. This just proves the lengths to which I'll go to procrastinate recording this music. I don't know what it is wrong with me.

Quarter of a Century

Traci is celebrating the big 2-5 today. Hooray!

Big Money Vegas

I went to Las Vegas over the three-day weekend. My sister lives there so it’s a very inexpensive little getaway for Traci and me.

I’m too cheap to be a good gambler. I hate to see my money go down the drain, so Traci and I work the nickel slots. That way we can have a little fun gambling, but we’re not really going to lose much money.

This time was special. This time I hit the big money! I put in a dollar, pushed the little button, the numbers spun around and I won 140 credits! "I hit the jackpot!" I said excitingly. Man, 140 credits, that’s a lot.

It took a minute to do the math--140 nickels adds up to…let’s see here…$7. Not quite as exciting as I had originally thought. But, also considering the math, I made a 700 percent profit. I started with $1 and ended up with $7. It was enough to cover the McDonald’s breakfast we had eaten. I feel good about that.

Big and Fake

I went to the University of Utah football game with my homie Tony last night. The best thing about Tony is that he says exactly what is on his mind, no matter how embarrassing or polictically incorrect it may be.

Since he's single, he would rate every girl that walked past us up the stadium stairs. Comments ranged from "She's a saucy mommy" to "I like 'em thick." The best comment, however, came when Tony spotted some cosmetic work from forty feet away. "Those are fake," he said matter-of-factly. As those fakies items got closer, his glance moved up a bit to the girl's shoulder, which bore a Tinker Bell tattoo. Before ever reaching her face, Tony exclaimed, "Hey, I got on that chick!"

Tony speaks highly and frequently of his very brief relationship with the girl with the fakies and I was happy to finally get to see her. His experience led him to take on the following anthem: "I like 'em small and real, or big and fake." Tony always keeps it interesting.

Love those Long-haired Lifeguards

My oldest sister, Lainee, is a rocker through and through. She loves Kip Winger, leather pants, fast cars and especially long hair. The following story will prove that this is genetic:

Lainee took her 4-year-old daughter, Meagan, to the swimming pool. Lainee noticed that Meagan kept smiling and smiling at the lifeguard--a teenager with long brown hair.

LAINEE: “What are you looking at, Meagan?”
MEAGAN: “That guy over there. I really like him.”
MEAGAN: “Do you think I will marry him?”
LAINEE: “I think you have a little while before you’ll have to worry about that.”

Meagan had her first crush, and of course it was on a boy with long hair. When I asked her how old this boy was she said, “Probably 17.”
“Wow, that’s old,” I said.
“Yeah,” she replied, “I can’t even count that high.”